I just went back to the beginning and read my very first post. Wow, was I ever in a dark place. November 2010 was not a good time for me. Got laid off, lost one of the greatest people I ever knew, my personal life was pretty crappy. That's kind of how my blog got its name. There is a song, Spending my time, by the 80s group Roxette, that I had been listening to quite a bit. Spending my time..watching the days go by...feeling so small... It seemed to fit my mood so well.I felt that I was just spending my time on the sidelines, while life passed me by. I had lost control of my entire life and that was difficult, especially for a control freak like me. I finally realized that I was not in control. I had to let go and life lead me, instead of the other way around.
A chance comment from my husband turned my whole world around. I realized how unhappy I was, in my career and my personal life. I decided that if I was ever going to take a risk, now was the time. I am not a risk taker and I should have been terrified, but I wasn't. These last two months I have been calmer than I ever have. When I let other people make me doubt myself, I turned myself back around and gained a peace and self confidence that I had never had before.
Now, while I'm in the middle of construction chaos, unexpected expenses and all the little wrinkles that come with opening a new business, I let the worry drive me for a few minutes and let it slide away. I've learned that worrying and stressing will not change the outcome, so why drive myself nuts?
So now I'm spending my tyme doing something I love and working towards my future, not anyone else's. I look forward to the days now, instead of dreading them. I'm scared to death about the future, but it's an exhilarated kind of fear. Life is good. I am so grateful that I managed to crawl out of my dark place and get a new lease on life.Spending my Tyme. How are you spending yours?
Great post...thanks for sharing!
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