A love letter

Sunday was my son's 27th Birthday.  I can't get over that number...27.  What happened to that little baby I held in my arms?  I can't say his birth was a difficult one.  I was in hard labor for less than an hour before he was born.  What was interesting, though, was that I had been told all along that I was having a girl.  When they told me I had a beautiful baby boy, I looked around to see who they were talking to.  When I realized it was me, I accused them of switching babies on me.  Luckily, they blamed my hysteria on the after effects of the anesthesia. Once they put him in my arms, though, I knew he was mine.  Those little blue eyes were the same ones that stared back at me in the mirror every day.  And that little smile was a familiar one as well.  Nope, he was mine.



For a long time, it was just the two of us..  I was in the throes of a miserable divorce when he was born and it made me appreciate his birth even more.  I made a lot of mistakes when he was young...who am I kidding?  I made a lot of mistakes when he was older, as well.  Luckily, we both survived them.

He was not a perfect child.   I always wondered what it would be like to have that child that everybody loves to be around.  The one that always gets the perfect grades, and says the perfect thing.  I didn't have that child.  I had the child that questioned everyone and everything around him.  I had the child that always chose the hardest path.  I had the child that was just like me.  Stubborn, strong-willed and a little thick sometimes.

But I wouldn't change him for anything.  Like me, he has to learn everything the hard way.  And although it breaks my heart to see him hurt, I know from experience that the hard times make us appreciate the good times even more.  They make us a stronger person.  And that's what he is.  A strong person.  He has had to overcome some very difficult times, and he hasn't let them stop him from moving forward.  I envy that sometimes.


We didn't always get along - I think it's because we're so  much alike.  Not on the surface, but deep down, with things that really matter.  He protects his heart just like I do.  He cares deeply, but doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve, just like I do.  He has left the pain of the past behind and is moving towards a better future.  And he's forgiven me for my mistakes.  I don't always agree with his choices, but, the, he doesn't always agree with mine.  We've learned that we may not like each other's choices, but we will respect them and love each other anyway.

What more could a mother ask for?

Happy Birthday, son...I love you.