Goodbye, Donnagan - Forever in our Hearts

I have always grown up with pets.  My earliest recollection were two standard poodles when I was very young, living in Germany.

Tojo

When I was a pre-teen, we lived in Australia and my mom raised Samoyeds.  The first one we had was named Tojo.  He was a character.  Every evening, he would go through the house, collect everything we kids had left on the floor, and dump it outside in the backyard.  Never knew why he did that, but he did.  A little later, we would get a female we named Tanya.  Once we moved to Alabama, they had one litter, and we kept one.  I named her Stinker, because she was always in trouble.  Sadly, Tojo was killed shortly after and we never had another litter.  Tanya lived to a ripe old age as my mother's companion and died in the late 80s.  Stinker was not so lucky.

My next companion was a little morkie that I called Gizmo.  I got shortly after I married and I spoiled him rotten.  Shortly after my son was born, Gizmo snuck out of the house and was taken.  That broke my heart, and was the end of my life with pets for a while.

Sarge

In 1988, David and I were stationed in Germany, and I found a litter of kittens in one of the warehouses where I worked.  The mother had been killed and the kittens were only about 4 weeks old and would have died.  I managed to give three away and kept one.  Amazingly, mine was the only one that lived.  My sergeant let me bring him to work so I could feed him from a dropper.  We named him Sarge and he was one tough cookie.  When he was about a year old, he broke his back leg.  He kept the cast on for one day, dragged it off and was back to bouncing around.  I had never been a cat person, but I loved this cat.  He was so ornery.  He would get in your lap to get petted.  If you didn't stop when he wanted you to, he'd scratch you.  My mom still has scars - so does my son.

Peka

In 1990, Dave came home with this funny little puppy that had been abandoned at the vet's office after heart surgery.  He was a dachshund/bull terrier mix and had the most spirit I had ever seen.  His name was Peka.  He had powerful jaws and I used to watch him carry six feet logs around in his mouth.  But he had the long body and short, stubby feet of the dachshund, as well as the attitude.

Sarge and Peka both flew back to the states with us.  Then, in early 1993, we decided that Peka needed a playmate.  So, on Valentine's Day, we went to the pound and surprised Daddy with this tiny little puppy with long black hair.  Daddy named him Rocky.  well, this tiny little puppy that fit into my hand grew into an 80 pound lab mix!  But he was my baby.  He was always so sensitive to my moods.  If I was upset, he would put his head in my lap.  If Dave and I raised our voices, he would sit in my lap and look at us with pleading eyes to stop.

Rocky

Rocky's Waterloo was squirrels.  He loved to chase squirrels.  At that point we didn't have a fence, so we decided to try the new invisible fence.  We put it in, attached the collar and watched him run right through.  Never stopped him, not even when we put a second collar on him.  After they wanted to put a third collar on him, we decided to build a privacy fence in the backyard.

On Labor Day 2004, Sarge started spewing blood from everywhere.  We rushed him to the emergency clinic and he was diagnosed with leukemia and we lost him that day.  A year later, Peka developed dementia and it got to the point where he would walk into a corner and not know how to get back out.  As much as it hurt, we decided to do the humane thing and let him cross over the Rainbow Bridge.  About the same time, Rocky developed kidney cancer.  It was slow growing and we were able to keep him until Thanksgiving of 2006.  It nearly killed us to say goodbye and we swore we were done with pets.  It was too painful and we were not going through it again.

Brenna

Donnagan

That lasted until the following March when we ended up with Brenna, a 4 year old puppy mill malti poo and 8 week old Donnagan, who was in a rescue.  Donnagan taught Brenna how to walk on grass, how to pee on grass, how to use the doggy door, and most importantly, how to be a dog and have fun and play.  Three years ago, we added Quincey, another rescue.  About that same time, Donnagan began having problems with aggression.  It continued for over a year until he was finally diagnosed by our favorite vet, Dr. Walker, as having hypothyroidism.  He went on medication and it calmed him for quite a while.

Quincey

Sage

In the meantime, we added Sage to our brood about six months ago.  Like Quincey, she was a pug/chihuahua mix and goes to work with me every day.

Recently, Donnagan has been getting worse.  He's been turning on us with no warning and is acting confused.  He's also spending most of his time, alone, away from us.  Every once in a while, for a few minutes, I see the fun loving puppy with the big smile.  But it doesn't last long.  We are concerned about what he may do to the others when we're not there.  So, with much sadness and tears, we have reached the conclusion that it is time to say goodbye.  Donnagan is only five years old and it's killing us to do this, but Dr. Walker reminded me that we knew he would not have a long life and that this was the most humane thing we could do for him, because he's not happy anymore.  He's been telling us, in his own way that he's ready to go.  When dogs are ready to die they often put a physical distance between themselves and their owners to help create an emotional distance.  So, in two days, we will bring him to Dr, Walker and say goodbye to our baby boy.

Donnagan, Quincey and Brenna, playing

Donnagan sleeps against me every night and I will miss his warmth.  He's always the first one up in the morning and sits while we make the coffee so he can have his treat.  When Dave cooks, he's always in the kitchen, watching.  We used to call him Chef.  Every evening, all the kids would have what I call the Kentucky Derby.  Donnagan would run from one end of the house to the other, letting the other dogs chase him.  He would always jump up on the couch with a big grin on his face.  His favorite place to be was what we always called his condo - one spot under my bed.  As he got larger, he had to find more ingenious ways to scoot under there, but that was his safety zone.  If he was upset, scared, or just wanted to be alone, he went to his condo.  Nobody ever bothered him there.  The best way to get him out?  Offer him a treat.  He'd scoot out of there so fast, it would make your head spin.

Donnagan  Westerling
January 2007 - June 2012

Donnagan went through puppy class with me at Petsmart and he won best trick.  I'll never forget how proud he was.  The picture Marti took the night of his graduation is one I'll always treasure.  And I still have his graduating bumper sticker on my fridge.

Donnagan, it kills me to do this, but I know you'll finally be at peace.  We love you very much and we will miss you, but know that you'll be forever in our hearts.  Dr. Walker and Lisa will take care of you and make your journey an easy one.  Easier than ours will be, as we grieve your passing.


Forever in our hearts.  We love you.